Yesterday was what I would consider to be the best day of my
life thus far. And it sounds so cliché perhaps, but I really can’t think of
anything else to top it. It was my 20th birthday, and to be honest,
I didn’t really have high expectations. I knew it would be a good day. I told
people it was coming up (also in an attempt to psych myself up for it a bit). I
mean, 20 is a weird one. It’s cool ‘cause you’re officially not a teenager. And
you’ve been around for 2 decades. And I know my life is going to change so much
in these years ahead. Which is cool and scary and overwhelming and exciting. I
mean. In this next decade I’ll graduate college, hopefully start my career,
hopefully travel, definitely meet some incredible people, maybe find a husband
(eek that’s a weird one)… we’ll stop there because I’m sure you get the idea.
Anyways.
It was just the perfect day. I got to go through my day
feeling SO incredibly loved and blessed. There was my AIFS family who instantly
greeted me at breakfast with hugs and happy birthdays and pictures posted to my
Facebook wall. There was Giselle who gave me the biggest hug when I came into
the classroom and said so many sweet things and brought us some fresh goodies. The
sun was shining. I consistently got Facebook notifications from friends and
family back at home which were almost overwhelmingly sweet—maybe just out of
the fact that I’ve been gone for so long. And I guess that’s what birthdays are
about? Getting to feel loved and special for a day? Well, needless to say I
just felt so content and happy all day.
Plus, everything worked out perfectly in the sense that we
actually had our AIFS goodbye dinner (which was sort of bittersweet), but was
nice because I basically got to go to dinner with EVERYONE! Oh, and everyone
sang happy birthday thanks to Cody starting it which was pretty goofy but
sweet. And then, not going to lie, we partied! Not only because of my birthday
but also because we had a holiday today, so no class. Plus, no one is really
going out tomorrow I don’t think even though it’s our last night here just
because we all have flights the next day and some people are leaving at 5 AM.
Plus, I think most of us want to spend the night together and hang out on the
beach and have it be a bit more low-key. So, it was kind of everyone’s last big
hoorah together and my birthday just happened to land on the best day it
possibly could have.
The entire day was incredible and I felt very fortunate to
get to celebrate it here with these amazing people.
And on that note… tomorrow is our last day. I had a
mini-meltdown on Tuesday where I cried a bit. But at this point it still hasn’t
really hit me. I made a little slideshow to show everyone tomorrow with
pictures of all of us. I’m sure people will cry which wasn’t why I wanted to
make it obviously but I hope people will find it cute. It’s also just a kind of
selfish way for me to do something I like to do that gives me an outlet to
thank everyone for what these four months have been for me. For us.
I will miss these people. I will miss this place. I will
miss this time.
Though I know that I’ve made friends for life. That we’ll
visit. That maybe we’ll come back to Cannes one day even, who knows? That it won’t
be the same. It won’t be THIS. Us, 19,20, 21 years old and young and free with
the world at our feet, in the circumstances we’re in, the places of our lives
we got brought together in. It will never be us trying to figure out Cannes
together.
One thing that’s comforted me a bit though, is just thinking
that… even if it won’t ever get to be THIS exact experience again… that doesn’t
mean it will be bad or worse in some way. If anything, I know those times are
going to be incredible, too. Just… different. Which is kind of scary and maybe
sad, but it’s just kind of how it is.
So I’m sure tomorrow will be sad. I say now I don’t feel
like I need to cry and I guarantee tomorrow I will be. Bags are starting to get
packed. We’ve taken off the photos and postcards that decorated the walls of
our dorm rooms. We’re throwing things away to make space or make our luggage
lighter. Some are shoving dirty cloths into their suitcases to wash when they
get home, while some of us are planning strategically for continued travel. So
maybe the busyness has also just taken up most of my brain so I’m not thinking
about the fact that we have one more day living here in paradise.
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